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DARK ANGEL


Three days before I am about to go to Hawaii with my girlfriend, I find out I got the part. I am to shoot on Monday. So I book another ticket, $500, for Tuesday, non-refundable, and I’ll meet her there. Next day my agent calls and they moved the day to Friday! $500 down the toilet. Oh well, that’s show biz.



I thought my audition sucked big time, but they must have thought I looked Italian or something because the  character was an architect named Angelo Biondello. When I arrived on set the director explained he would like to have me attached to some sort of harness and crane to make it look like I am falling off a building. He told me it would be completely safe, etc. etc. I agreed. Later, after I watched another scene and met some of the cast, they took me to my set—a makeshift building ledge. It was about 20 feet off the ground and they now explained that I would have to actually jump, but it would be okay because they would put stunt pads down and it would be very safe and easy, etc. etc. Like a fool, I agreed. When I got up there and looked down, I was actually terrified, but all these stunt people assured me it was nothing.



Then Jessica Alba comes up and meets me. She is dressed in a ball gown, very provocative, cleavage all over the place. She is even more beautiful in person. She looks down and says, “You’re scared, aren’t you?” I said, “Well not really but…” She grins, “No, you’re scared.”



Then they start blowing this huge fan. So the terror of jumping, the huge fan, Jessica Alba and her cleavage, and about 50 crew staring up at me and the director says “Let’s rehearse.” Well, I mean, I completely froze, forgot every line. I start to panic inside. Okay, I am professional, I have to pull it together. I manage to remember a rough outline of the words and that is good enough. Jessica takes off and her stand in, a lovely girl steps in and tells me quietly, I should really ask for a stunt upgrade. She’s right and I feel supported. I mention it to the stunt woman and she says she’ll do something.



So we start and this is how it looks: Jessica comes to the window and I am on the ledge, listening to the Lion King of my Discman. She startles me and I fall off the ledge, but just in time she grabs me with her hand and drags me up. Then we talk and she convinces me to not commit suicide. I tell her where the missing drawings are. So we do the startle bit about 10 times, and each time I have to leap off this ledge and fall into the stunt pads. I have pads on but it still hurts because I don’t really know how to fall and I tense up.



Finally that’s over and now I can do the scene. Jessica pulls me up over the ledge, and each time she does it, my face is basically right in her cleavage. So this is showbiz, I think. I keep doing it like the audition, but the director isn’t getting it and I feel terrible. Finally he says, just don’t act it at all, no comedy. Okay, I thought it was comedy! So I do it that way and he loves it. All the while, Jessica and I don’t really communicate. She yaks to the crew a lot, and to her boyfriend watching below, who happens to be her co-star, but its apparently a secret at that point. When we’re done I tell her it was an honour and she giggles. Poor girl, I think, she has absolutely no life. She is famous and a prisoner.



Back at the AD trailer, I request my upgrade. The AD gets all fussed up and has to call the stunt co-ordinator there. She says she gave me a stunt bonus--$100! I say, no way, I want to be upgraded to a stunt actor. She says, “That wasn’t a stunt, trust me” So why was I wearing stunt pads and jumping into a stunt cushion if it wasn’t a stunt? I tell her I’ll take it up with my agent. When she goes, all the AD’s are telling me she is full of shit.



Thankfully, I did get my upgrade and I made a lot of money on that one, so the $500 plane ticket didn’t hurt so much. Tons of people saw the show and I got many good comments. Many thought I was the only interesting part of the whole episode. Dark Angel got cancelled not too long after, but it wasn’t my fault.



CHRIS ISAAK SHOW


I landed a great little cameo on this hip and happening show as an annoying guy who fires a barrage of questions at Chris at an all-candidates meeting where he's running for parks commissioner.



While we were waiting around I had the opportunity to joke around with Chris, a very amiable guy. He told me how strange it was being an actor - doing this show, when he's not really an actor but a musician. I looked at him straight and said, "Chris, are you an actor or a musician?" There was a far-away look in his eye, he slurred something and then we were interrupted by the AD. The scene went great and I left, happy to work with this charismatic guy who's famous hit everyone knows but can't remember the name of.



Anyway, about a month or so later, I heard that Chris packed in the show after a successful five year run because he wanted to get back to his music career! I can't help wondering if I was the one who inspired him to come to his senses.

Rob has been a professional actor since 1999, appearing in film, television and theatre.

Check out his resume on IMDB


For more representation, see contact page.

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